Don't Worry (I'm Sorry) [Backdated to December 1st]

[jakeyd]

[It's kind of funny, in a sad, ironic way. Once Jake caught wind of people calling him 'the most popular guy in school' he figured he'd never have to worry about being left out of a group again. Yet, here he was: feeling completely out of place with his friends and hiding from them. Not that it wasn't one hundred percent his own damn fault, mister 'noticing his romantic feelings for his friends too late so now they're dating', it just sucked. He really wishes he hadn't noticed at all, so that he could still hang out with them without it hurting; and without the ever looming risk that he would say something dumb and awkward to one of them again. Rich must have been so uncomfortable when Jake slipped and called his freckles cute, ugh.

"You could always let me take over for a while."]

No. No way. We've talked about this already.

["Yes but, honey, it's still the simplest solution! Isn't getting to 'hang' with your friends worry-free worthy of accepting just a teensy amount of my help?" The voice of Jake's absentee mother asks, the strange digital tint to it reminding him with every word that his real mom had ditched him. He sighs, irritated, as he reaches up to rub a particular spot behind his ear.]

Last time you 'helped' you broke my legs worse than they already were. I'm good.
["Sweetheart, you know those were special circumstances-] Look.

Just because I'm talking to you doesn't mean I don't still hate you. I'm not gonna trust the creepy robots that hurt me and my friends, ever. So you can go back to telling me how to fold paper into little animals or you can shut up. [Jake gestures to the half finished origami on the table surrounded by little cranes and a few lopsided paper dogs as he awaits a response.

"If you insist."]

Good.

[He's not exactly sure where along the course of the passed month or so he'd begun talking to his SQUIP again. It had started out small, accidentally listening to her tips on staying out of trouble with Rich and Micheal. Little reminders not to let them catch onto the feelings he himself hadn't noticed in time. 'Don't say that out loud', 'Straying into flirtatious territory there, aren't we?'; more and more until Jake realized he was talking to her more than his friends. Not to mention, spending more time 'alone' than with them. But it was fine, he told himself--he had things under control. He wasn't really listening to her advice, and he still didn't trust her. He just wanted someone to talk to, that's all. Someone that could help him kill the boredom. The only easily accessible 'person' from home that he wasn't in love with. Wait, no, that's wrong. Not love, crushes. They had to be 'just silly crushes', or...or when would he ever be able to face them again? He's not Micheal, he can't hide this shit well enough to fool anyone. He'd only barely managed to hold it together when his parents left, and even then Rich had noticed something off pretty quickly. Hell, Rich had probably noticed something off before he'd ever started hiding from them. How freaked out must those two be by now?
He's a terrible person for running like this, but the only alternatives he can think of are worse.

Jake suddenly allows his head to drop down onto the table with a thud, crushing the little paper dog he'd been working on. Fuck everything.]

Comments

[notsogrimreaper]

You know, these usually stand up a little better if you fold the legs like this...

[When Jake looks up, he'll find Ryoji sitting across from him, tongue slightly stuck out as he folds up a piece of colorful paper. He makes sure to hold it out so Jake can see the folds he makes for the legs before he finishes up and sets his little dog down on the table with a small smile. The dog stays perched on the table as he laughs.]

Of course, it'd probably work even better if we had actual origami paper...

[He trails off, still looking at Jake, his smile a little sad. He's not going to bring up the talking to himself, even if he's more than a little worried about the 'broke my legs' comment. He'll wait until Jake is ready to talk about that. But that doesn't mean he's not going to try to prompt some conversation.]

I'm surprised. Usually I see you with Rich, or that other boy with the glasses... are they busy?

[jakeyd]

[He freezes up at first, watching silently as Ryoji creates a proper paper dog and panicking about how much he'd heard of Jake's little 'conversation with himself'. When it doesn't come up, Jake eases up a bit; but only a bit. They were still talking about the friends he was hiding from, and he immediately drops eye contact to look at Ryoji's canine creation. It looks a lot better than his do.]

Oh, uh. Yeah, they're... [Jake starts attempting to imitate Ryoji's folding process on a fresh piece of paper. Something to get the nervous energy out.]

They pretty much started dating as soon as Micheal got here, so I'm just, y'know...giving the new couple their space! Trying to decorate my room but, uh... [He pokes Ryoji's paper dog gently.]

Obviously not this good at it yet. I think I got the birds down?

[notsogrimreaper]

[Ryoji's smile is a bit more apologetic as he notices how much Jake panics. He obviously thought he was alone, and wanted to keep it that way. He'll leave him alone soon... so long as Ryoji can make sure he's going to be okay.]

It's alright. It took a lot of practice for me to be good at it myself. And your cranes look very nice.

[He hesitates for just a moment.]

You know, you can still spend time with your friends even if they happen to be dating. I think they'd be lonely if you gave them space. Especially considering how close they seem to be to you.

[jakey_d]

I helped make a thousand of them for a club project, so I've actually had some practice with cranes.

[His folding slows down as Micheal and Rich are brought up again. Ryoji was a good guy worrying about the three of them like this, but...

"They're fine without a third wheel hanging around all the time."]

They're fine without a third wheel hanging around all the time.
I kinda fucked some stuff up with them, anyway. Pretty sure Rich is still pissed.

[That wasn't entirely true, but it made a good excuse. Jake keeps his eyes down the whole time, pretending to focus on making a less lopsided dog.]

[notsogrimreaper]

That sounds like a sweet project! You know you get a wish granted if you fold a thousand of them.

[Ryoji frowns as Jake mentions being a third wheel, and it only deepens as he continues on.]

I don't think you're a third wheel. Why would Rich be upset with you?

[jakeyd]

Really? That's pretty cool. [Normally he would think of it as a myth; some cool cultural fable from the east. But considering where they were, and what Jake had seen here? Maybe folding enough little paper birds really could create some form of magic.

Maybe he could try it to wish these inconvenient feelings away.]

Is that one of those things you have to do yourself, or does it still count as a group?

[Do these things expire? Even if they don't he might have already used up his first wish saving Rich from the fire. Oh, right. The fire.
Jake unconsciously shifts back in his chair and pulls his arms in a bit, physically withdrawing the only way available to him.]

Uh, it's kinda a long story? I guess the short version is...that I almost got them killed.

[notsogrimreaper]

[Ryoji is confident in his abilities. He was even before he came here, but then again, his world had actual magic. He knows very well about the power of one's determination to make dreams reality.]

Mm, I don't know! I think it should count as a group too. That means you have a wish sitting in reserve, right?

[He notes the way Jake seems to retreat in on himself. Pretty strange for a young, confident, obviously popular-looking teenager. But... well, everyone has inner demons, don't they?

His expression is even more sympathetic.]

I'm sure you didn't do that. But if you'd like to tell the long story, I'm all ears.