Ready Player One

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[First thing Michael notices is that his ass isn't planted in the beanbag chair he fell asleep in. What is being a senior for other than late night video game benders with your best friend in the world, right? Yeah.

Man is he stiff, though. He groans and shifts around, trying to get comfortable again. It fails miserably.

A moment later he opens his eyes with a big frown and sits up.

Definitely not his bean bag. Not his room??? He didn't even drink last night what gives...]

Yo, Jeremy, this isn't funny.

[He stumbles to his feet and stretches to get life back into his limbs. He's in some like old-fashioned sitting room? In a really uncomfortable chair. There's like a fireplace and shit.]

Who's house even is this?! How did you get me here? Jeremyyyyyyy!

Comments

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[It's a strange, ambivalent feeling he gets when he hears that gameboy sound. It's associated with so much nostalgia and goodness... and also the worst almost-zombie apocalypse ever. He feels cold fingers down his spine and bristles as he slow-mo turns to face...]

HoL Y SHI T!!!!!!

[Cue dramatic fake-kung-fu moves as he backs away and crosses arms over his body.]

HOW DID YOU GET YOUR OWN BODY?!

[leftright_a]

[He hoped wrong!]

Oh, I wouldn't know. I got here just as you. Actually, there's a lot of people here from all over, and all of them got here the same way.

[He shrugs.] Either way. It's my job to help you get your footing in this new environment. [Because he has nothing else to do.] Are you going to let me?

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[Okay but like, dude. Dude. Previous experience means this couldn't have gone any better.

Michael gently pats his body, as if that would give him a clue.]

I didn't... you haven't... you're not in my brain are you? You're just... here?

[He sort of reaches out to see if his fingertips will touch the Squip's shoulder. He remembers Jeremy told him about the hologram. The brain figments.]

And are you going to try to change me or create a hivemind of squip'd teenagers?

[leftright_a]

Ah, ah, [he tuts, gently sliding away from Michael's hand.] I'm very much here and touching is not allowed.

[He puts his hands behind his back.] I am simply only here to help. If change or hiveminds are necessary to achieve someone's goal, then the answer is yes. Oftentimes it is. Humans are very flawed.

But! I have not a someone, nor a goal to help achieve, so! [He smiles and inhales through his teeth.] I'm a bit... thrown off. Are you going to let me help you with this small thing? A castle tour?

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[The way it tuts like that makes Michael's skin crawl and he retracts his hand to rub his own arms for a moment, then scratch at his head, as if that could get the creepy invasive feeling of the squip getting inside his head away.

He frowns.]

I can't believe I'm going to fucking say this but yeah okay sure. Give me the tour. But any funny business and I'm outtie.

[leftright_a]

Affirmative! [he chirps.] Come, on, come on, right this way. Hurry up.

[The squip strides behind Michael and keeps going, gesturing for him to follow him down the hall. It's a long one, and there are plenty of windows to offer light and fog that drifts in from the clouds off of the Edge.]

Now, you see, this place falls under many definitions of "ridiculous." I've granted me a solid form, for one, and it seems to draw in people from many places and many times. The rooms change places. Even I can't put an explanation to it.

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[Michael watches with skeptical eyes, but follows at a languid pace. He won't 'hurry up', thanks, but he will come.

And holy shit he's even agreeing with this thing on some points. That's messed up. But 'ridiculous' is absolutely the correct word here.]

The rooms change places?

[As if this wasn't weird enough already.]