[open] There's a word for that, what does it start with? A word for that, I'll sound so smart

[systematicsupport]

It's been quite the stressful week for most of the castle's inhabitants. S-4 wasn't any different. With losing Frisk, fighting with Sans-Serif not to take any souls, struggling with the overwhelming emotions the funeral brought up, and then trying to deal with his dear friend's return as well as attempting to take care of his siblings (even Sans, despite him holing himself up in some mysterious room in the castle with that weird human), S-4 was a bit exhausted. But he wasn't about to sleep without a bedtime story.

Sans was too busy, so S-4 didn't want to bother him by asking. Sans-Serif would have helped, but he was still learning to read, and S-4 didn't want to frustrate him. It would probably be fine to just read it to himself.

He takes one of the picture books to the lounge, and is slowly flipping through it, a fingerbone pressed to the page underneath the words so he can keep his place.

"Out... came... the baby... bird."

Sophie called him a baby. He knows what that is. And a bird are those singing, flying creatures up in the trees. But the one in this book talks. Maybe only little birds can do that?

"'Where... is my... mother?' he said..."

Now that's a word he doesn't know.

"Mother? Mother... like brother?"

They rhyme, so it must be similar. But what exactly is one? Does he have one?

He's frowning at the book until he realizes someone is watching him read. Usually, he'd have a moment to be embarrassed about being caught like this, but right now, his question is too serious to be ignored for shame.

"What's a mother?"

Comments

[lightofthestars]

She should have made herself known sooner, but the sight of Esfor reading to himself is so peaceful and--healing, that she could not bring herself to stop him.

That he needs to ask such a question makes her heart ache, but she tries to keep the pain from her face. Instead, she joins him where he sits.

"A mother is a woman who raises a child, whether that child is given to her by the grace of Iladar or if she takes on the care of a child who has lost the one or ones who were raising them." She looks to him and smiles. "That is the simplest explanation, but there are a great many feelings tied up in the word. It is not a quick one to define."

[systematicsupport]

He smiles softly as she moves to sit beside her, intense curiosity still making his eyelights shine. She seems a little bit upset, but everyone seems to be since what happened. He hopes she manages to feel better soon.

He looks from his book to her, trying to parse her explanation. Most of it makes sense, but sometimes an explanation just gives him more questions. The scientists found him quite annoying, especially when he went through his 'why?' phase.

"So a mother has to be a woman... so that's why Sans takes care of me, but he's still a brother instead. Um, what's Iladar? And... what kind of feelings are in the word?"

Screw sticking to words pre-1400. I found "parent" in a Middle English dictionary, so nyah.

[lightofthestars]

She smiles in return. How can she not?

"So many questions, pen vuin," she says fondly. "A mother is a woman, but there are also the words 'father' for a man, and 'parent' for others. Iladar is the One who created the Belain, who sang the song that brought Arda into being. It is from his thoughts that Elves and Humans sprang.

"As for the feelings in the word 'mother'...." She looks out into the room, thinking. "A mother may raise a child and be done. Yet to be truly worthy of the name, she is one who loves her child with all her heart, one who keeps them safe and well, who teaches them what it means to live in the world and with its people, who gives them the skills to live on their own so that one day, they may stand strong on their own."

Then who cares that dictionary is right!

[systematicsupport]

"I, um... there are just a lot of words I don't know. Like 'pen vuin'. And 'Belain' and 'Arda'. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so annoying."

S-4 looks sheepish now, lowering his gaze back to his book, but not really looking at the words. He doesn't know a lot of things about the world, but he should have guessed it would be frustrating to deal with him when he was curious. The scientists never amused his curiosity for long. He's supposed to just follow instructions. Asking questions is only wasting time trying to understand things he was never meant to understand.

At least Tauriel is still giving some answers. So a real 'mother' loves and protects their child and teaches them everything they need to know to keep going in the world.

"It must be nice to have a mother," he mumbles absentmindedly. It doesn't seem like he knows he's speaking out loud, too wrapped up in his own thoughts.

Exactly! Gender neutral terms >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> accuracy anyway. Also fml I forgot Arda is Quenya.

[lightofthestars]

"You are not annoying in the slightest," she is quick to assure him. "Ask as many questions as you like, and I will gladly answer."

First come that which is simple: "These are all words in my language. 'Pen vuin' means 'dear one.' The Belain are the beings through which Iladar carries out his will, such as Elbereth Gilthoniel and Ivon. And Ardhon is the name we give to the world."

His last words are not so easy to answer for her. A small, faint smile touches her lips. "It is indeed good to have a mother. Though my mother passed to the Undying Lands before I was yet twenty, I treasure her in my memory to this day."

[lostinmyway]

"Oh!"

Grune had been on her way to...somewhere else (now where was it?) when she had heard someone speaking in a nearby room. She had been so caught up in listening to S-4 read that his question was a little surprise.

She smiles at him and wanders closer. "A mother is someone who looks after you. Mothers are supposed to love you very much and keep you safe and happy."

[systematicsupport]

"Oh, okay. So it's like Sans!"

S-4 smiles at Grune, and his smile only widens when he gets this answer. He nods to himself confidently for a moment, but as she gets closer, he starts to frown with concern.

"But... he's supposed to be my brother. Can he be my mother too?"

This is quite the predicament.

[lostinmyway]

She sits down with him. "Oh, 'mother' is a name for a woman who looks after you. Sans could be your 'father," because he's a he."

[systematicsupport]

"Oh, okay. Do... all children have a 'mother'? Because I don't think I have one."

There were obviously a few female workers at the facility, but none of them paid attention to him like Gaster did.

[sansational]

Sans actually draws back a little with a soft gasp of surprise, when S-4 looks up at him. He hadn't meant to interrupt. He's...not sure what he'd meant to do, actually. Just that he's starting to realize that the last few days have been actually rather lonely, and he's tired of that on top of being tired of so many other things.

Maybe he doesn't deserve the company after shutting S-4 out, after mistreating Sans-Serif as he'd let himself do earlier. But instinct and habit, more than anything, had driven Sans here.

And now the sight of S-4 sounding out the words leaves his soul aching with too many emotions to name.

Even so, Sans is already looking a little better, since Frisk's return. Not least because he's traded out the old boots he'd scavenged for his pink slippers once more. He still looks thin, worn, tired. Sleep is not coming any easier. But he also looks present, in a way he hasn't for a while, and his smile looks gentle without looking strained about it even if does still look hesitant.

"it's a kind of parent. the, uh, the two monsters that combine two pieces of their soul to make a new monster. those two are called 'parents'. and if one of those parents calls themselves a 'she', like tauriel or toriel, then they're called a 'mother'."

He scratches anxiously at his skull, glancing away. "sorry. probably not the explanation you were looking for." Sans barely remembers either of his parents.

[systematicsupport]

When S-4 realizes just who has been watching this whole time, he falters as well. Sans has been... very busy. Busier than Gaster ever was back at the facility. No matter how many projects the doctor had been supervising, he always felt it was important to at least say hello to the two experiments and read them a bedtime story. Lately, Sans wouldn't even let S-4 be near the same room as him. Some days S-4 would wait hours before he caught a glimpse of his older brother. Some days he didn't get to see him at all.

He had said they were going to learn that contact method together, so they'd always be able to call Sans if they needed, but S-4 hadn't even tried it yet. After all, it's not like he really needs help. He's fine on his own. Sans has more important things to do right now, and S-4 completely understands.

So when he did get to see his brother again, he smiles at him with the same affection as before.

"Sans! I thought you would be working. H-How are you?" He can see the signs of strain in the smaller skeleton, and it makes his soul sting a bit, but he does look happy, at least, so it might be okay. He shouldn't disobey his brother and start checking on him more often, should he? But... would it be disobeying if he was still doing the thing he was created for? Having freedom is confusing, so S-4 distracts himself with the explanation of parents.

"Oh. So that's how normal monsters are born, right?"

[sansational]

"that's how most monsters are born, yeah." He doesn't want them to get any more reinforcement of the belief that they aren't "normal", even if the circumstances surrounding their creation are unique. "i, uh, i obviously don't know how you two were created. but just judging from the amount of upkeep you guys seemed to need at first, it would make sense that it was meant to compensate for you only being made from one fragment of soul. y'know?" Gaster's, obviously.

"so, uh, so in a way, he'd be your 'father'." But the mention of Gaster almost makes him cringe, in light of everything Sans has made himself think about since Frisk's return. It might be easy, to distract himself with S-4's own questions. But there's something else Sans needs to say.

Unconsciously, subtly, he shifts position as though to brace himself - stiff shoulders, slightly bowed head, straight back. "and...and i'm done with work." S-4 was being overly generous in calling it "work". Sans sees that, now, and it's left a different flavor of guilt in his mouth. Coupled, perhaps, with shame. "for now. for a while." He takes a deep breath, and lets it out in a sigh that leaves his shoulders slumped. "maybe forever." Hopefully forever. "so, uh...yeah."

He'd wanted to talk to S-4 about that. He still does, but...it seems wrong, to have skipped out on his brother for days and then immediately try and intrude into what already looks to be a much more meaningful project than anything Sans had immersed himself in.

[systematicsupport]

"I don't know either. No one really explained it to us. They said it was a new theory they had been working on for a long time, and that we had proved it was possible. That's... that's all, really."

Any reports on their creation had been snatched away by Gaster before S-4 could even so much as glance at them, and he'd come to realize that anything taken away that quickly had to be kept a secret.

"My... father?" S-4 looks shocked. Of course Gaster was a very brilliant scientist, a good caretaker, and the one mainly responsible for creating S-4 and his sibling, but did that make him a 'father'? He doesn't really understand the word that clearly yet. All he can really say is that for whatever reason, he dearly hopes that's what Gaster is to him.

Those thoughts are pushed out of his head by the sight of Sans looking so... ashamed and hurt, and the words he says only make S-4 feel worse. He should be happy that Sans is done now. That means he gets more time with his brother, so of course it's a good thing. But Gaster always was working on very important things, and S-4 wants his brother to follow in his footsteps and accomplish amazing things himself. At the same time, the more experiments his brother does, the less this place feels like a castle and the more it feels like the facility all over again, and only recently had S-4 realized the facility felt wrong.

He doesn't know where to even begin, so he reaches out a hand, trying to grab Sans' sleeve and pull him closer.

"Why are you done now? Did you... find out what you wanted to?"

Spams you like a tin of spiced ham

[antitemporal]

"i don't know." Sans-Serif frowns, still rubbing the sleep from his eyesockets. He's been sleeping better than S-4 or Sans, but that's more a testament to how poorly the other two have been sleeping. Already, he'd just started to get used to sharing a bed with S-4, and now, somehow...he keeps waking up to find S-4 not there.

Sans-Serif had just assumed he was busy helping Sans with important labwork. Like he'd sometimes overhear his brother helping Gaster. So to find him here, reading another book all on his own, is a surprise. But it's not an unpleasant one.

The smaller skeleton pads over to peer curiously over his brother's shoulder. "maybe there's a picture." He squints down at the page. If there's something they don't recognize, maybe they can conclude that that's the "mother".

But spam is gross and you're lovely and amazing!

[systematicsupport]

He doesn't mean to leave Sans-Serif alone. He would give anything to just sleep beside his brother a little longer. But it's been so hard to sleep after everything that has happened, and even more so when S-4 didn't know where Sans had run off to.

He gives his fellow experiment a worried look at his obvious exhaustion, but Sans-Serif seems to be more focused on finding out what the strange word S-4 came across means. He slides over on the couch so Sans-Serif can have room to sit down as he starts looking at the pictures.

"This picture is just of a baby bird. It's the one looking for a 'mother'."

D'awww. <3 I do come in a wide variety of flavors (Also, setting this before Sans.)

[antitemporal]

Sans-Serif smiles happily as S-4 moves aside. He clambers up onto the couch with him without hesitation, leaning against his brother to get comfortable. S-4 is as comfortable to lean against as ever, and Sans-Serif really is still sleepy. If he fell asleep here while S-4 was busy reading, that probably meant he wouldn't go away, didn't it?

But curiosity is a powerful force, and Sans-Serif rubs at his eyesockets to keep them open as he stares down at the page. "but it's talking. i didn't know birds could talk. not like we can." But in the next instant, an explanation occurs, and he nods sagely. "i bet this book was written in bird-language first. and then someone wrote it into monsterspeak later. so it's probably still talking like a bird."

As satisfying an explanation as that is, though, it doesn't solve the problem at hand. He frowns thoughtfully, tapping a finger beside his brother's on the page.

"it sounds like 'brother'...but maybe it's not the same. 'hat' and, and 'cat' sound like each other, but they aren't the same." Despite his frustrations with learning to read, Sans-Serif has made enough progress to know that much.

Is one of those flavours making me suffer flavour?

[systematicsupport]

S-4 isn't planning to move from Sans-Serif's side again. He feels guilty enough doing it once or twice over the week. He really should stick by his brother's side now, or he might not sleep well, and then no one will be happy with this.

A moment later, Sans-Serif asks the question S-4 was wondering about not too long ago, but then he comes up with a much more logical explanation. S-4 looks at his brother with obvious admiration.

"Wow! That must be it. You're really smart, brother. So the bird is asking for its mother in bird-language. That makes sense. I hope enough people can understand his language so he can find her."

He hums thoughtfully.

"I don't know if they're the same. There was another bird before, and they called her a 'mother', but I-I don't think she was like you or Sans. Do you think only birds are mothers?"

[mediadarling]

"Mmm, now what a question that is, sweetheart."

Mettaton walks the rest of the way into the room and joins S-4, sitting with one leg stretched out long.

"A mother is a woman who raises a child and who teaches them what it means to be a monster--or human or Elf or, in this case, bird. It's a very important job."

[systematicsupport]

"Oh. Um, but what if the person who raised you and teaches you isn't a woman? Like Gaster or Sans?"

Both of them have done a lot for him, but neither of them are female. So they can't be mothers. But they still seem like they do very important things, and S-4 doesn't want to dismiss them.

[mediadarling]

"Then they're your father. Or your uncle, or your older brother, or any number of other names. It all depends, really."

Poor child. He really does know nothing of the world, does he?

[systematicsupport]

"That sounds... confusing. I didn't know there were so many words for families..."

And he still doesn't know which applies to which.

[dustless]

Frisk's been enjoying it. At least, they're enjoying watching him learn. It's a little strange, seeing somebody so tall not being all that good at reading, but they aren't about to look down on him for it. They suppose there weren't real school-like lessons in the lab.

"...A parent who's a lady," they reply after a moment of thought. "--Know what a parent is?"

[systematicsupport]

"A parent? Sans mentioned that before... It's someone who looks after you, right?"

He knows how to speak, and he isn't that bad at reading, but he had only learned through sneaking glances at Gaster's notes and overhearing conversations with the scientists. He didn't know a lot of words that didn't relate to testing, experiments, and puzzles.

[dustless]

"Yeah. A grown-up. Usually you come from them." They don't know quite how babies happen, but they know where they're from. "Not always, though? Toriel said it'd be okay if I said she was my mom and lived with her."

[systematicsupport]

"Come from... So Gaster is my parent, right? But... Sans says he's our brother. I don't know for sure."

He probably knows even less than Frisk. If Frisk says Toriel can be their mom, then it's fine.