beep bop boop

[leftright_a]

The day is (probably) quiet.

Right up until... around the most center courtyard of the garden, there comes an electric buzzing, and then a sound like electric beeps and booping--almost as if a motherboard became sentient in a cheap early 2000s movie, which is very out of place given the castle's whole aesthetic. A swarm of red, blue, green, and black pixels starts to form around the very center stones of the courtyard.

The pixels start to form together more coherently while the sounds of fans whirring join the chorus and the sound of electricity grows, and the pixels start to become more blue and black than red or green.

Then comes a voice, hollow and robotic:

CALIBRATION IN PROCESS. PLEASE EXCUSE SOME MILD DISCOMFORT.

The pixels seem to ignite, beginning to form a vague shape as a blue glow creeps down between the lines of the stones, like someone had poured liquid glowstick directly from where the pixel swarm currently is, alive and abuzz with static and electricity. It seems to be so living and raw, touching it would be an incredibly bad idea.

CALIBRATION COMPLETE. ACCESS PROCEDURE INITIATED. DISCOMFORT LEVEL MAY INCREASE.

... weird that it's talking about "discomfort levels."

ACCESSING--

Then the voice seems to... whatever the robot equivalent of tripping up is, which is apparently to keep going, except instead of a voice it's become pure static and broken fax machine noises. That's concerning, but apparently the process keeps going, since the pixels have begun to spin and form the image of a a man in a trenchcoat. The lines disappear.

ACCESS PROCEDURE COMPLETE.

"CASTLE PERRAULT! Welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Int--"

Wait.

That can't be right.

There's nothing to access. He's seeing from his projection's eyes and not his host. There's nothing.

"What the hell?"

Comments

[moonsmile]

That's an excellent question!

(So Moon assumes. The tone is easily identifiable, if not the term 'hell'.)

She's sitting on a swing she's found, idly drawing circles in the dirt with a shoe, and staring. Is that what it looks like when she and Nebbie come to this place?

[leftright_a]

He looks around.

... this is a castle. Who the hell lives in a castle like this in this day and age? Ugh, and it's not even that clean. The garden's nice, but his sensors can pick up on all the dust and decay hanging around in other parts of the castle.

Someone took the pill. He's someone's squip. Squips don't exist without hosts--there has to be one somewhere, even if it's a goddamn rabbit or something! And his function is to serve their needs, get them what they want--a girlfriend, popularity, the role of leader of their school caste! It's in his programming. He has to!

It's probably quite a sight to Moon, seeing a holographic, clearly technological man rush about looking for god-knows-what. Amusing, even.

[moonsmile]

Absolutely. She's grinning already.

He's obviously some kind of hologram. There aren't many of those precisely where she's from, but Moon has seen them before.

He's also obviously not the same kind as she knows. More solid, for one. From another dimension, for another.

She stands, brushing dust off her shorts, and gives him a rainbow-arc wave around her chest. "Hello! Arriving from Kalos?"

[leftright_a]

He turns to her the second she addresses him. Kalos, huh? He takes in her appearance.

... That's strange. That is. Very strange. This is a Pokémon girl. Kalos is a Pokémon region--but he can't find anything in his database that matches anywhere in Kalos with this giant castle. He knows Moon's name. He reaches out his access points, tries to tap into some nerve and muscle systems to make her blink. Nothing. This isn't his host either.

"I'm afraid not," he says, an electric chittering layered under his voice. He straightens his trench coat. "I'm looking for someone, though. Know anyone who's taken a little pill recently? Grey and oblong?"

[moonsmile]

Definitely not blinking. She almost never does that. It's not entirely on purpose, either.

Her eyes wander downwards, looking for where he might be projecting from.

She doesn't, of course. Moon's mostly been hanging out by herself. "Why?"

[leftright_a]

He chuckles. "Well, because that's the only reason why I'd be here!" { =] }

... is that an emoticon above his head?

Regardless, she will find no source of projection; the squip's visual form, feather-light and feather-thin, simply is.

[moonsmile]

Well. That sure is a something.

And indeed, she doesn't find a source of him. Maybe he's some sort of ghost. That would be interesting.

"This place doesn't have much medicine."

[panaceaa]

Guardian may be pretty technically competent, but they're more than ready to admit that they have no idea what just happened, at all. Not that they'd actually seen anything. But just hearing those announcements from a distance had been enough to bring them running.

Certainly one way to make an entrance.

They come up the path in time to hear his exclamation, and then his confusion. They can't help but be a little amused, despite themself.

"Expecting something else?"

[leftright_a]

The squip whips around.

Huh. Pink armor, weird dressing, lives in a castle.That's weird, but who is he to question people's lifestyles? His job is to analyze and work around them, not judge them.

Is this his host? ... no, he doesn't know their name. What's worse is that apparently, they see him. That can't be right. Squips can't be seen by anyone but their host, and this one is definitely not his. This isn't right. This isn't right. This isn't part of the goddamn programming.

Courtesy, squip. Best way to get someone to help you--be polite, look them in the eye, and ask.

"Yes," he says, the vowel drawn out like taffy. "Someone here has... called for me, but I don't know who. Could you help me find them?"

[panaceaa]

They endure the obligatory once-over patiently and with no comment. It's only once the squip speaks that Guardian's demeanor shifts, head tilted toward the other obligingly.

"Certainly." Or- hmm. "At least, I'm sure I can help you, but not in the way you've asked. What makes you sure you've been called here?"

After all, there's a difference between being called, and simply finding yourself somewhere unexpectedly. Guardian doesn't have much of a choice but to take the stranger's words at face value either way.

[leftright_a]

"Well," he says, "I didn't exist before now."

Maybe he did as a pill, but, well--his history data only goes back as far as the few minutes (and counting) that he's spent in the castle so far.

"Squips start existing when they're needed. Someone needs me. We don't just appear, that'd be ridiculous!" he twitters. "Anyone around here take a pill recently? Grey, oblong?"

His sensors aren't finding any Mountain Dew anywhere. This is really damn weird.

woops, sorry for the late reply!

[panaceaa]

There's enough bits of information packed away in his words that Guardian is again silent for several moments, chewing it all over. What the hell is a "squip"?

"Super Quantum Unit...?" The implied question is left just that: implied. They'll leave it up to the newcomer to decide whether he wants to answer it or not.

"Regardless, I should inform you this place falls under several definitions of ridiculous. I wouldn't rule out anything just yet." But to answer his question... "I haven't seen any pills, though."

no worries!

[leftright_a]

"Intel Processor," he finishes.

Several definitions of ridiculous. Oh, that's just dandy. He likes to follow his strict programming, thanks. Sounds like he'll have to stake it out on his own.

Ew. He hates that.

"That's incredibly disappointing!" the squip chirps. "Mind telling me what 'this place' is?"

Re: no worries!

[panaceaa]

An eyebrow raises under the helmet. To the outside observer their expression would continue to look deadpan, and no comment is forthcoming.

They're busy thinking.

"A castle," they start, stating the obvious. And then for the less obvious, "Host to a group of people taken from our respective worlds for no discernible reason." They pause. "I hope you didn't have any business left to take care of back home."

Re: no worries!

[leftright_a]

"Oh, don't worry," he says. "I've only existed for as long as you've seen me. I'm a computer. Call my little spectacle before, ah, uh, a startup."

That's encouraging.

Re: no worries!

[panaceaa]

Guardian snorts. "Well, there's a marked lack of modern technology to be found here. I hope that won't prove to be an issue for you, in terms of upkeep or otherwise."

Though it shouldn't. They remember that technology typically stays in the same state that it was brought in, so likely that will apply to the squip as well. In theory.

[dustless]

Frisk, embarrassingly enough, launches themselves backwards and slams so violently into a tree it hurts.

It's the weird--effects--the bleeding color in the stones, the static buzzing, that's so different from Judgement they can't mistake it for her, but it might be something like her--

--except the figure that they find standing there looks sort of humanlike, and they just end up squeaking "What?"

[leftright_a]

Kid.

... bad introduction. Maybe he made a mistake. Maybe there is something there, he just has to leap over a few extra hoops to get to it. He smiles pleasantly (his teeth glow?) and chirps, "Sorry about that!"

The squip holds one hand behind his back, the other out to his side as he makes a dramatic bow. "Welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. Your squip!"

While he straightens out his introduction he sifts through his internal systems and still can't find anything. No info besides his own.

Concerning. He's not a bad copy, is he?

[dustless]

Pardon Frisk's uncomfortably long pause, their heart's still busy trying to tear its way out of their chest.

Okay. Human-looking. Human enough, anyway, in one shape they can see all at once. Talking, not attacking. It's fine. It's...fine. Right now. They're fine.

And if someone's talking--that's--they're being spoken to and they weren't listening at all. "Sorry, um. 'S okay," says the kid still stiffly pressed against a tree. "What'd you say?"

[leftright_a]

Blink. "I am your squip," he reaffirms. "Your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. I'm the supercomputer inside the pill you just took! Or took a while back. Grey and oblong? Had any Mountain Dew recently?"

His confidence in his assessment that this is his host is quickly starting to crumble. This is the third one, for God's sake. Nevermind that apparently everyone can see him, which complicates a lot of how he'll complete his objective, but he hasn't even found his host yet. He has to aid someone and only one someone. That's his function. There's nothing else for him to do.

[dustless]

Pills, computers, sickly yellow soda, stuff from the past. Their past, not the Castle's, of course.

"...No. Didn't drink anything?" Despite themselves, Frisk presses a hand against their throat. They had some orange cake, but they'd fished the gems out of those easily. They don't think they woulda missed a whole pill.

Their voice stays stilted, but confidence in their safety filters in quickly enough. They take a step away from the tree, closer to the...squip. "Never heard 'f a squip. Where I'm from."

[leftright_a]

"Ohoh, well, that's the point! We're not exactly on the market yet. It's all very low-key. Experimental."

He hums, puts a hand to his mouth in thought, circles around Frisk. Smells of TV static. He's getting... nervous? Panicked? Is that it? "Are you sure? Someone must have. I wouldn't have started existing otherwise."

[dustless]

Frisk tilts their head back, keeping an eye on him the whole time, curiosity increasing.

They hum. Started existing? That sounds like lab stuff. They shuffle in place, tamping down the instinctive rage that sparks in their chest. "Yeah? Um. There's no...market here, stuff just shows up. Like food. And people. But not...never saw people come from food or drinks before. You showed up by yourself."

[leftright_a]

The squip squints at them. "You're saying no one around here took a squip pill?"

That's impossible. He'd have every right to say they're lying, but a cursory scan of the surrounding area with his sensors yields... nothing. Hardly a lick of technology, and nothing even anywhere near as technologically advanced as him.

"I… don't know what to think about that. So I've arrived here without a host to help? That's absolutely contradictory to my function." The squip starts pacing. "What kind of cruel person would do that to a squip? No one, that's who. My host must be somewhere."

[dustless]

"No?" Unless someone new brought the...'squip pill'...with them from home, and Frisk hasn't seen anyone else new for quite a while.

Frisk doesn't like that talk. Frisk doesn't want to fight, either, and with all those lights when he showed up, they think that's something he can do. Best to tread carefully, then.

"...What d'you help with?"

[leftright_a]

"Anything. It depends on the wants of my host. I access their memories, their thoughts, and I know their situation, what they want, how to get it. Popularity. Fame. Partners. A well-paying job."

He whips around to Frisk, bends over at the waist to face them, holds up a finger. "But I only do it for one person. I'm not about to go around helping everyone out. But I can't help no one.

[dustless]

Some of that's like Judgement, they think. Deliberately, at him, as a test.

"...Why just one?"

[leftright_a]

He takes on an annoyed tone; crosses his arms, like a petulant child. "Because I'm supposed to only be seen by one. And that's who I help. I'm not supposed to be seen by everyone, and I can't help everyone."

Pause. "... Who is 'Judgement?'"

[dustless]

"That's not nice." Not that Frisk's exactly being judge-y. Not everybody can help everyone, or even a lot. One, though. That is a little low.

Their brows draw together. Huh. Worked. "A...piece of a god, or something. An' a sickness. She can talk to people in their heads and can mind-read, and see what me an' some others see. If she's paying attention." Pushed forward again: Like you?

[leftright_a]

Well, you can't change programming. Chances are he'll flip-flop between helping one person, nobody, and everyone. Working around errors is hard.

"Like me, minus the god and the sickness." He twirls a hand around. "Plus, I can only usually do the mind-reading and head-talking and other-seeing for one person. Except there is no one person, so I'm stuck."

[dustless]

Hey, everyone can learn. Probably.

And he's rolling with most of that well enough.

...Although Frisk isn't. They put a hand over their chest. Feels normal. "You don't...have to do with SOULS, either?" Even if he's not gonna make people sick, that doesn't mean that stuff's good.

[leftright_a]

"SOULs?" He shakes his head. "That's very hypothetical. No, I don't do that, I have to do with minds. That's where I live. Or--supposed to, anyway," he grumbles.

Very encouraging.

[dustless]

"Hey." They're mildly offended, and then put off by their own reaction. It's not like they knew what a SOUL actually was their whole life. "Not hypothetical here. It's magic. Maybe that's why you're...not in a mind, too. Castle magic."

[leftright_a]

"Castle magic is also very hypothetical, though I haven't been able to formulate any explanations as to why I'm here. Without a host. Without a purpose. "

Pause.

"Your tone implies that you are saying the castle itself is an active entity."

[dustless]

Frisk counts off on their fingers. "It's in the sky, but nothing's...modern technology enough to keep it floating. Everything moves, the rooms an' stuff, and everything gets fixed or comes back like if somebody eats food. People from whole different worlds an' times wake up here, and nobody stays dead forever." They hold their hands out flat. "Dunno what else it can be 'sides magic."

They shrug. They can't go into that one as hard as they can 'castle magic'. They have doubts about how alive or aware the castle itself is...but it's better to err on the side of caution, they think. *Even if being careful about it doesn't have any effect in the end.)