Enter the reflection

[darkerstripes]

The first thing he notices is that he's no longer plugged into his charger base. He wasn't asleep- he doesn't have the need- but he'd set his senses to 'hibernate'. It passes the time faster than being alert all night, when his (caretakers? friends?) humans are asleep. He has his danger alert system on, so if something entered the apartment he would know.

Apparently the same was not true of exiting the apartment. His eyes come back online with a soft green glow and he starts in surprise. Dust, cobwebs... stone. Nothing is familiar. That isn't possible. He doesn't dream, and he sensed no change, no movement. Hesitantly, he stands, glancing around, poised at every joint to run or dodge.

No danger is apparent, no matter how many times he scans. He can't trust his sensors, though, because they didn't even detect his arrival here. How could he have been moved without noticing?

"Kotetsu?"

He calls to his host. His own voice echoes back through the room, sounding eerie as it returns to his ears from the outside. They buzz with light feedback. He frowns. If anything has happened to Kotetsu... The android feels his eyes flash red for a moment at the thought.

He can feel the anxiety rising in his wires, sparking circuits and making his voice box feel squeezed. He remembers what Barnaby taught him, about controlling fear. Breathing in three, out five. In three, out seven, in three, out ten. Focus on your physical form. Take stock of what you know is true, toss out what you're assuming. Start over.

He is in a throne room. There is no immediate danger. He is unsure how he arrived. He is unsure of Kotetsu's whereabouts. The android takes out his phone and attempts to send a message. No signal. He does another breathing exercise. He doesn't actually need the air, of course, but his body requires the pressure change to speak, and the rhythm of it soothes even his synthetic body.

All other options exhausted, he must explore and search. He opens his map program and begins with a fresh, empty blueprint. He estimates the dimensions of the room, adds in the doors. He chooses one of those doors, and begins his exploration.

Comments

[darkerstripes]

Very, very bright. Toshi is thrown for another loop, having expected it to still be nighttime. He frowns at his internal clock (his literal internal clock) as he feels his aperture adjust to the light.

That's when he spots Baranaby. He opens his mouth to greet him, both relieved and confused, only for Barnaby to speak first, confusing the android all the more.

"I am incredibly lost, but not for the kitchen." He cants his head. The voice will be perfectly familiar, even if the formal cadence is not. But the green LED glowing eyes under the brim of the wrong-colored hat will give away the misidentification.

"Barnaby, how did we get here?"

[ojisankink]

He looks pretty out of it. Maybe he just woke up, but the rooms had switched around on him? He stands up, already feeling himself shaking his head. If Kotetsu had just woken up at a proper time, he wouldn't be like this...

The formal tone does confuse him. Kotetsu... never talks like that. He's never heard him speak so calmly and properly. He looks at him in surprise, only to notice those green, glowing eyes. It's like they're lit up from within, like...

"Kotetsu? You got here a few days ago..."

[darkerstripes]

Something cold and horrible grips at Toshi's synthetic stomach. He feels the stored water for cooling in him turn to ice. Lack of recognition, even looking into his robotic eyes. Did Barnaby have memory troubles again? Did it have to do with this place? Who does he have to teach a lesson to, for hurting him?

He calms the tide of rage, shutting his eyes for a moment against it. He opens them again as he shakes his head.

"Not Kotetsu, and I only just... arrived. You two have been here... for days...?" How does that begin to compute? Toshi feels dizzy. One thing at a time... that's what Barnaby would tell him. If he... remembered who he was. Fuck.

"Do you... know me, Barnaby?" He takes his hat off, to make his eyes even more visible. His most notable trait aside from being Kotetsu's twin.

[ojisankink]

He looks... frightened. Frightened and angry, though Barnaby can't exactly blame him. From the way he's talking, it sounds like he's only just gotten here, and both Kotetsu and Barnaby had reacted much the same to finding the little moments one remembered and the other didn't.

Except those were just moments. Barnaby wasn't expecting to forget an entire person. Someone who looks like Kotetsu, no less... he feels his heart getting tight, and as he reaches up to brush his hair away from his eyes, he tugs on it just a bit, just to ensure he's still in reality.

"I... I don't know you. I can see now that you're not Kotetsu, but... I-I'm sorry."

His voice breaks for a second and he forces himself to breathe. Frisk had said this may happen. It's someone from another universe, or from his future. There are plenty of possible explanations that don't involve another part of his mind getting scrambled again.

"I may be from an earlier date, before we met. This place is rather strange with how it handles time."

[darkerstripes]

Frightened and worried, mostly, but the thought that someone-most likely Maverick- might have his dirty fingers in this. His dirty fingers back in Barnaby's mind, makes his coolant boil. Makes him feel the destructive rage his creator gave to him all over again.

He keeps his calm, though. For now. Barnaby needs him to, if Toshi is any guesser. Being told he doesn't remember someone... he can only imagine how horrible a moment this must be for him, and he hates that he can't even comfort him properly in it. The hair tugging... a habit he recognizes, makes his pseudo-lungs feel compressed again.

"You don't need to apologize. I am sorry as well." Sorry he's causing this moment, sorry he was so eager. Sorry that someone might be messing with him...

But Barnaby suggests something strange and interesting. "A different date?" He looks around at the building around them with new eyes. "This place...?" He struggles to word every question he has all at once, and fails.

"Please explain to me what you know."

[ojisankink]

Barnaby is desperately trying not to believe that Maverick is behind this. There is proof, yes, but there's proof to the contrary too. He can believe in that, can't he? He knows Maverick is unable to use his powers. He can't be here, puppeting him around again.

He can't, but the more Barnaby denies it, the harder he tugs on his hair, the harder he tries not to give in and fall apart. He can't do that to someone who clearly thinks of him as important.

"If I don't need to apologize, then you don't either." He forces a smile.

"Explaining what I know may be more complicated than you realize. Are you asking what I know about our world, or what I know about this place you've been taken to?"

[darkerstripes]

If Maverick is behind it, Toshi will find him. And he will break his face, and then hand his fate over to Barnaby. He almost hopes for that opportunity, not that he would want Maverick involved in anything ever. It shouldn't be possible anyway, right?

Toshi sees the anxiety levels rising, the hair pulling. He tries not to tense himself, but he knows he's doing it. "All right." He concedes, unwilling to argue and add to Barnaby's distress.

"You are correct. I should have been clearer. But... I also shouldn't demand answers from you..." He wants to reach out, to comfort. He knows his Barnaby feels grounded by touch, but he doesn't have that permission, here. He wants to understand where the hell he is and why, but he won't provoke panic in Barnaby to do so.

[ojisankink]

If there's one thing Barnaby is hoping for, it's that he'll never have to see Maverick again. He wouldn't know how to face him. Part of him would want to kill him, make sure he could never do what he had done to him, but... he knows that would be wrong. He's worked so hard to move on past revenge. He could let Maverick stay alive, even if the thought twists his stomach in knots.

"You aren't demanding. Y-You obviously need to know what's going on. I just... I just really don't understand."

He doesn't understand why memories of this other Kotetsu have been wiped from his memory. He doesn't understand why he can't convince himself that Maverick isn't here. But he does know. And he can't calm down knowing there's even a possibility. His breathing starts getting quicker.

[darkerstripes]

"You have a right to understand as well." And understanding is more urgent for Barnaby right now. Nervous, Toshi steps in closer, into the realm of familiar distance.

"I want to help. What can we explain together? Perhaps you have not met me yet, as you said." Barnaby helped him learn to cope with panic before, he can return the favor now. Maybe this Barnaby hasn't learned the coping mechanisms Toshi's Barnaby taught him yet.

"Do me a favor. Breathe in deeply one, two, three, and out again one, two three. Then in, one, two, three, and out for five this time. One, two, three, four, five..." he puts on the soft, calming tone he knows has worked before. He watches to see if Barnaby will follow his lead.

[ojisankink]

Barnaby's breath hitches as Toshi steps closer, but he doesn't move back. Whoever this may be, he isn't dangerous. He can't distrust someone who looks so much like Kotetsu. If that was the plan of whoever made him forget Toshi, then they'll have failed.

But... he's right. Maybe he's not forgetting at all. Maybe there's another explanation. He tries to keep that in mind as he follows Toshi's guidance.

He doesn't know these exercises, but Toshi is so calm and gentle that he doesn't want to do anything else but listen. He starts following Toshi's lead. It's hard; he gasps for air when he inhales and his breath comes out shaky when he exhales, but very slowly, he starts to breathe normally.

[darkerstripes]

There is probably another explanation. Maverick being to blame doesn't make as much sense as... well, time shenanigans. As strange as that sounds. Toshi doesn't understand how he got here, or why there are apparently a lot of lost minds here, from different places and times, but that is apparently the case.

Tomfoolery is parsimonious.

He continues the counted breathing, until Barnaby is breathing in for three and out for ten, slow, careful breaths that can relax back to normal after that. "May I touch you?" His hand is half-lifted, ready to rub his back, if Barnaby will let him.

[ojisankink]

It should sound ridiculous, but everything about this place is strange in that way. Barnaby has barely had more time than Toshi to put that together. All he can really tell from talking to people and through his own research is that there is no limit to the number of iterations of people that could arrive here, considering the multiple universes and multiple points of time within each universe.

Somehow, that makes him relax a little more, thinking of the vastness of the universe. The touch, he thinks, will bring him back to earth, and so he slowly nods, continuing his breathing.

[darkerstripes]

The vastness and wonder of the universe can be very stabilizing in the strangest of ways, too. Remembering the infinite sky and the millions of space bodies... not to mention apparent alternate universes. It makes any particular frightening 'what if' a lot less daunting.

Toshi continues his calm guidance, counting to three, and out to seven, now. That's where breathing should stay until he's calm. At the invitation, he settles his hand on Barnaby's back, rubbing a very slow, careful path up and down. It's helped before, so he tries it now.

[ojisankink]

He keeps his eyes closed for a while, just imagining and remembering. He thinks of all the possible universes out there, and that his is safe. Kotetsu's is safe. Hopefully, this other Kotetsu came from a safer world as well. And even if he hasn't, this castle isn't as dangerous as it could be. He'll be safe here. He will.

He keeps taking in shaky breaths that start to steady with the careful pattern along his back. He opens his eyes again, takes in the man's worried face, and manages a very soft smile.

"Well, you're as good at calming me down as Kotetsu is..."

[darkerstripes]

Toshi's hand keeps a slow, steady rhythm up and down, a long oblong oval across Barnaby's back. It's soothing to Toshi as well, to be something grounding, something soft and supportive. He can observe Barnaby's calming down even before he speaks, and there is the smallest smile on his face.

"That is a very high compliment." He smiles a little more, glancing down. "I did learn from the best."

[ojisankink]

He finds himself leaning against the robot not long after, just basking in the affection. He doesn't remember who this is, but it feels right to care about them. He just wants to treat them with as much respect as the other Kotetsu deserves.

He pauses and looks up in surprise at the comment.

"You... learned from Kotetsu, then? Despite looking like him?" He's starting to really feel he needs some answers.

[darkerstripes]

Toshi has to control a little breath of surprise when Barnaby leans on him. He wasn't expecting to be warmed up to so fast, by a Barnaby that doesn't remember him. He recalls how long it took to gain his trust before, and feels a strange mix of luckiness and guilt. His hand slowly stills, very hesitantly wrapping around the leaning hero in a supportive sort-of hug.

He probably does need some answers. They both want them, but Barnaby really deserves to go first. To understand what and who he's speaking to. Toshi makes a small awkward sound, feeling the 'despite' settle wrongly in his chassis. "Partly... mostly I learned from you." Though he was under the impression it was Kotetsu's doing that Barnaby learned how to take care of himself in the first place.

[ojisankink]

He may not remember him, but Toshi seems to remember. Enough to hold off panic attacks and hold him and always know just what to say. It's confusing, and maybe a little concerning, but selfishly, it also feels nice for someone to understand what he needs. He can't help but give in.

He curls a little closer to Toshi, listens carefully to his words.

"I suppose if anyone would be able to teach you, I'd best know what I needed..."

He sighs softly and shakes his head.

"Listen. I know you just got here. You deserve an explanation, and I'll give it to you... I just really can't figure out who you are."

[darkerstripes]

Toshi remembers so much about Barnaby. Months of secret planning. Fighting by his side. Being taken in, finally, and trusted. Learning how to human with him, learning about how to be a hero. Protecting each other and becoming close friends. Risking his existence for Barnaby's sake, and losing himself under Adam's knife... being saved, again, and finding freedom permanently. Falling in love...

He shakes himself back to the present, warmed to the core from the way Barnaby is so close. He wants to give him anything and everything he needs. Toshi wants to be a good friend. A good companion. He... selfishly misses the easy affection he'd started to have back home.

"I understand." With his previous encounters with memory problems... Barnaby would be especially sensitive to not remembering someone. Helping him deal is more important. Most important. "Perhaps we... haven't met yet, for you." He's gotten that far in realizing things. Not everyone here was... spirited away at the same time.

How does he explain his existence from the beginning? It would only upset Barnaby more. "I am unit H-13, nicknamed Toshi by Kotetsu Kaburagi. I was designed to reflect his skills and attributes. I am your friend."

[ojisankink]

He wishes so badly he could remember even a fraction of what this Kotetsu does. If he knew at least a portion of it, maybe he wouldn't feel so guilty for forgetting. Maybe he'd be more confident this was just a case of differing timelines, rather than a case of someone being wiped clean from his mind.

He wants to know, since it seems so important to the other man. But at least he can be told, and maybe he'll start to truly remember later.

"I dearly hope that's the case, rather than it being proof I've forgotten something else." He offers a shaky grin. "As strange as that sounds."

But even his gentle teasing fades into complete shock at even the beginning of an explanation.

"You... you were an H unit? Like the ones we fought?" He bristles instinctively, before letting himself hear the rest of the android's statement. "Kotetsu... nicknamed you. And you became friends with us."

He's not sure he should believe that, but... but someone that wasn't a friend would have used his weakened mental state as a chance to attack or kill Barnaby, not as a chance to comfort him.

"Why were you designed to look like him?" Was he another more realistic copy? Meant to take over when H-01 failed?

[darkerstripes]

Toshi wishes Barnaby knew him as well. He wishes with a terrible ache, a pain that stabs each time he looks at Barnaby's face and sees confusion there, sees that lack of remembering. He knows this must be even harder on the hero, though, so he locks that all very tightly away. Barnaby needs him, and he suffers more from this than the android does.

He doesn't think it's forgetting... the forgetting looks and feels different, from his observations. But time may tell. The facts are, Barnaby doesn't know him, and needs to be told. "It doesn't sound strange." It really doesn't. It makes perfect sense.

Oof he knew this explanation wouldn't be pretty. He tries not to wince, nods instead. Yes, an H unit like the other battle units. Yes you fought them. Yes, Kotetsu adopted him and gave him a name... a nickname, but a name nonetheless. He's somewhat tensed, ready for Barnaby to reject that as too unlikely. He will leave, if he's too suspicious and unwelcome. No matter how much it hurts.

Nothing could hurt the way that question does. Toshi recalls the pain on Barnaby's face when he first learned, back home, what Toshi's purpose was. He swallows hard, unable to make words work. "I was. Designed to function as an... obedient replacement for Wild Tiger. My... creator... coveted..." He can't finish it. He swallows again and stares into the middle distance.

[ojisankink]

This must be painful for Toshi. If Barnaby knew how bad it was, he would help, but his panic makes him less observant, and so Toshi manages to keep his feelings secret for now. Maybe he'll get Toshi to open up to him the way Kotetsu did... but it will obviously take time.

He thinks it should sound strange, even if he's used to bizarre explanations by now, but... considering the fact that Toshi is from a world like his, perhaps he's seen enough bizarre things to be able to accept this.

Barnaby, on the other hand, isn't sure how to accept any of this. He doesn't want to reject Toshi, not at all, but he isn't ready to accept this either. Can he really trust something that was made to turn against them?

SHould he really be blaming Toshi for that?

That pain returns, a horrified look forming on Barnaby's face. "You were..." He doesn't want to voice it either. He's going to be sick just imagining it. Someone wanted Kotetsu to themselves, and thought that meant they should design one in his image to obey him?

"Who was your creator?" he finally spits out. He has a feeling he knows which organization they were a part of, but he can't imagine who would desire Kotetsu in that way.

[darkerstripes]

Opening up is something he has done for Barnaby, and would be willing to do again... given time. He's too worried about the hero for now, and too fussed over how this revelation will affect him all over again. He will remain stoic for Barnaby's sake for the foreseeable future. Even if he can't manage to say the right thing at all, anymore.

It's a lot to have to accept. Toshi will leave him be, let himself be rejected, if that is what Barnaby needs and asks of him. Just a simple request and he will be gone. He's almost tempted to leave anyway, with the way Barnaby is looking at him. That look of horror hurts terribly.

As does the question. Memories of Adam flash before Toshi's eyes and he reacts far more than he means to. He doesn't even realize he's making a pathetic sound of pain and fear, as he curls away from Barnaby and looks down to hide his face in hair. He's shaking, a little, half lost to the past and half present.

His voice is small. "Adam Brooks."

[ojisankink]

He wants to stay stoic for Barnaby's sake, but unfortunately, just saying this much is too much for Barnaby to handle. Even two simple words can shatter Barnaby's entire psyche. Or more, one word.

'Brooks.' That's his last name. The last name of his dead parents. As far as he knows, all of his relatives are dead, and there are none that are connected to the Brooks family name besides him now. He knows this. So why did someone with his last name create this android?

He'd like to hope it was a different Brooks. It's a common last name... but he knows he can't believe that.

He takes a step back from Toshi. He's shaking too, and his expression is no longer just a look of horror, but it is twisted with rage. Part of him wants to accuse Toshi of lying... but he can't be. He wouldn't lie about his own creator.

"And who is Adam Brooks?" His voice is deceptively even, almost emotionless, despite his anger and disbelief.

[darkerstripes]

It almost doesn't matter that Barnaby can't stay stoic. Toshi is too busy trying to keep himself grounded, too worried and anxious on all levels about sharing this truth that he can't observe as well as he should. He can't even look at Barnaby.

Since this Barnaby doesn't know him... he wouldn't know the truth of Ouroboros, would he? He might still be missing the memories of his twin brother, taken away for an entirely different purpose by Maverick and raised into a monster. Toshi is a monster too, for making him learn this now. Learn it like this.

He glances up, sees Barnaby's face, and looks back down in despair. He shouldn't have said this, shouldn't have said anything. Should have made something up or been vague... He can't back out now.

"Your brother. Taken by Ouroboros, made invisible by Maverick..." It was all Maverick's chess game from the beginning, but Adam turned out far more twisted than even the chessmaster himself. Toshi keeps his face in his hands, struggling against tears.