[INTRO] this is the lamest starter i've ever done i'm sorry

[trombones]

There's a skeleton in a hoodie sleeping on a fountain in the courtyard.

Last thing Sans knew, he had passed out on the couch. So waking up on the edge of the fountain would be the last place he'd expect to wake up... if he wasn't still asleep. Somehow loudly sawing logs with a respiratory system he doesn't have. Eventually, Sans moves a little in his sleep. He brings a hand up to scratch at his sternum, then the inside of his nasal bone. Gross. He then throws the same hand up over his head as leverage to turn himself over, roll on his side, get comfortable...

... and fall into the fountain.

He makes a pretty  big splash for a skeleton. This is the same guy who (probably) curbstomped a branch one time. A few seconds pass and the water settles. Then... nothing. Literally nothing. For anyone who decides they want to save a drowning skeleton (or just watch him drown), they can peer over the edge and catch something bubbling on the surface. Somehow, he settled to the bottom of the fountain. Doubly somehow, he's still sleeping.

It's the benefit of not having lungs. There'd be an "I don't know what you were expecting" somewhere in here if bubbles weren't coming out of his nasal cavity like a cartoon character snoring underwater. Whatever, he's literally made of magic.

Comments

[dustless]

SANS. WHY.

Good thing Frisk tends to wander the gardens most of the time. They race from their intended path, green scarf almost getting in their face enough to make them trip, and immediately set to work grabbing his arms and dragging him out of the fountain.

"Sans! Wake up, don't sleep there!" He might not even hear their concerned scolding, voice even softer than he's used to.

[trombones]

KID, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM MONSTERS AT THIS POINT BUT YOU COULD'VE EXPECTED THIS.

Though falling in the water still somehow didn't wake Sans up (maybe it's the lack of skin), getting grabbed out of the water does. He stirs slowly despite the rough feeling of being dragged. His legs work first, finally and unconsciously working to kick himself back up to the fountain's edge.

"Mmph--" Cough. "--hhmph."

Dang. That was some nap. He doesn't exactly feel refreshed about it (nothing new, good rest was coming by easier and easier lately), but his mind also doesn't yet register that he's soaking wet either. The first thing he notices when he opens is sockets is actually the green scarf, which he eyes blearily follow up to Frisk's face.

"... New scarf?"

[dustless]

THEY THOUGHT HE'D NOTICE GETTING WATER IN HIS SKULL AT THE VERY LEAST, OKAY.

Good. Less of a chance for them to fall in entirely. Usually they wouldn't mind, but their concern it outweighing their sense of fun at the moment--

--and at the question, they nearly shove him back out of sheer surprise.

"...no?"

Frisk's face flickers through quite a few expressions as they put the pieces together.

"...you...you're new."

[trombones]

NOT WITH HIS EYES CLOSED, JEEZ!!!

"Heh... at what? Napping? I've been playin' that game for a while, kid."

The nap game. Yeah. Sure. Sans shifts... then finally notices his clothes squelching as he does. He looks down.

Then at the fountain.

"... Huh."

That's not a couch.

[dustless]

HE HAS A NOSE.

"No--yeah, I knew that."

They've known there was a possibility of meeting another Sans here. Obviously.

It's still...weird...and slightly unsettling to see him? For some reason?

Frisk keeps tugging him until he's actually out of the fountain, at least, and then takes a step back to look over him a little better.

"Meant...new here. At the castle."

[trombones]

YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU GOT HIM THERE.

Sans flips his legs over the edge until he's out and sitting upright. Without really thinking about it, he grabs his slippers floating out of the water. Obviously, they're wet too, and he stares at them like he can't quite put together why.

"... we move to a castle or something?"

Yep. That's literally all he can think to say. Good one, Sans. At least it's registered that this isn't Kansas anymore. Or a couch.

[sansational]

Big splashes into the fountain are not unheard of occurrences, around here. Sans has even been known to make a few happen himself. He's just sauntering back up to the castle after catching a good nap down by a lake when the noise catches his attention, and he looks around just in time to see the water settling back.

He chuckles to himself, and waits for whoever had fallen in to clamber out.

...he keeps waiting, and wonders if they might have hit their head or something. Sans makes a beeline for the fountain, and then moves a bit faster once no one makes an appearance, and then finally just blinks over the last few feet to sit on the edge and peer into the water.

And keep staring.

Well.

This is...interesting. And, admittedly, a little creepy. He's gotten used to having Sans-Serif around the place, of course. But even if the kid is him, he's still a younger and smaller him, and so it's a little less creepy. There's some distance there.

This...this is him. Give or take a few weeks, maybe, but basically him. And a him with a hoodie that's survived in much better shape, Sans is a touch jealous to notice.

Sans does reach in to fish himself out of the water, at least hauling him upright and back onto the fountain. It's mostly for the sake of being able to more easily check his own pockets, though.

[trombones]

Creepy would be an understatement if Sans was actually awake. The skeleton doesn't quite wake up yet, but he's content to let himself set himself wherever he (him??) wants.

If the other Sans wants to fish through his pockets he'll find the usual. A whoopee cushion, some keys on a ring (albeit missing one), and a days-old crumpled grocery list crammed with handwriting from himself, Papyrus, Frisk, Toriel, and somehow Mettaton at the bottom.

Don't ask, he doesn't even live there.

Anyway, the list had a lot of the brothers usual back-and-forth bickering, a sign the list had been added to over the course of a few hours. Sans would add oddball requests for weird food, followed by Papyrus leaving comments next to it. A highlight: "SANS! HUMAN GROCERY STORES ARE TOO REFINED FOR JALAPENO MAC-AND-CHEESE!"

There's pocket lint too. If you want more, I mean.

As the dru Sans does whatever he decides to do, the wet one slowly opens his eyes. At first, he doesn't say anything. Still waking up, the first thing that registers is that he's wet. The next, there's... him. In front of himself. Sans squints blearily.

"... guessin' this means I can go back to sleep."

Meaning he's pretty sure he's dreaming.

[sansational]

Score!

All Sans had on him when he arrived was a joy buzzer and some pocket fluff. And he's gotten some good laughs out of it, but this... Yes. This is what his life has been missing most. So Sans is just. Going to carefully pull that whoopee cushion out of the other Sans' pocket and place it in his own. He's sure his other self will understand, given the circumstances.

He examines the keyring, recognizes the one missing with a widened eyesocket, but ultimately replaces it. The pocket lint is some quality stuff, he can tell that much just by touch, but Sans knows better than to spoil pocket fluff by removing it from its natural environment. It's then that his fingerbones brush the grocery list, and it's more out of idle curiosity than anything that has him pulling it out to read.

And then read again.

And then carefully fold up and tuck into his own other pocket. Even Sans can appreciate that this is a selfish and somewhat pathetic thing to do. But this Sans actually has a Papyrus to go back to, and so Sans thinks he's entitled to a bit of that right now. Even Papyrus' handwriting is more than he's had in months or probably ever will again.

By that point, the other him is stirring. Sans sits back, kicking his feet idly against the fountain, and waits until he sees the wet skeleton's eyesockets open out of the corner of his own. He doesn't look himself in the face, though, mostly because...well, it's even creepier when the other him is conscious.

He grinds his teeth thoughtfully for a moment, staring up at the sky as he considers what to say, and then shrugs. "i mean, you can, if you want. it's a nice day out. and, uh, this is a pretty good spot to nap, if i do say so myself. one of my usuals. but, hey, it's a big fountain. i can share."

[trombones]

Sans won't mind losing the list. It's from a shopping trip from a few days back, and he actually forgot it was in his pocket... you know, despite having his hands in them 24/7. We're going to have to talk about the whoopee cushion though. Joint custody, maybe.

"Huh."

As he wakes up a little more, his surroundings finally click. The fountain, the courtyard... and the definite lack of couch. The skeleton brings his arms up to stretch, then knocks the side of his head to get some water out of his sockets as he brings them down. He seems pretty okay with this... if only because he thinks he's dreaming.

"Now that I think about it though... I don't remember the last time I dreamt about talking to myself," He says, looking back at the other Sans. "Y'know, I always say to myself... 'I can't believe the cloning machine worked'."

[sansational]

Sans' laughter in reply sounds as much startled as amused. He ducks his head a little, scratching anxiously at the back of his skull. "oh man. you, uh...you have no idea."

He doesn't have to remember the last time he dreamed about talking to himself. It's a daily occurrence. Though those kinds of dreams are pretty frequent, too. They're just not all that nice, usually.

Speaking of, that thought gets Sans to finally a glance at himself, then, because...well, one look at that expression and Sans knows that his dripping wet clone really does have no idea. He finds himself wondering how best to get this out of the way. But then again, if his other self thinks this is a dream, maybe he doesn't necessarily need to be that careful about what he says, yet. He can get all the housekeeping sorted first, then drop that particular truth bomb.

"there's a babybones version of us and papyrus here, too. from, uh, from pretty far back in the timeline? they haven't even made it to snowdin yet. don't even call themselves 'sans' or 'papyrus' yet." He shrugs. "and they don't like it when people do call them that, so, y'know. don't. the one who looks like papyrus is 's-4'. the one who looks like us is 's-2'."

He kind of wishes Sans-Serif were here right now, actually. The kid is getting...a little alarmingly good at identifying different timelines, actually.

[demonthatcomes]

Typically, you'd find Chara in three places: the Aviary, the Towers, and the Gardens. There's rumors of a secret underground lake, but Chara hadn't discovered it yet. They were just ruminating a possible way to get there when a loud splash interrupts them. What the hell is that?

The child peers over the fountain and the bubbles give Sans away. Considering the last experience they had with Sans and fountains? Bastard deserved to fall. Do skeletons drown? Let them. It's the comedian's own fault for being careless.

They scoff and turn away to look for a place to think somewhere else. What if he did it on purpose? Seems typical of Sans to not care about where he's sleeping. But a fountain is not an ideal place for a nap. If he's trying suicide, he himself told Chara you'd only be dead for three days. Is there a place at the castle he's hoping to regenerate at? Perhaps there's something Sans knows that no one else does.

Chara rolls up their sleeves and retrieves Sans, yanking him from the scruff of his drenched, dripping hoodie. There's a nearby rosebush they lay Sans over... he's a skeleton, so it's not like thorns will damage him. If they did, well, that's tough. He should've picked a better place to sleep than the fountain.

[trombones]

Sans stays asleep the whole way there even has he sinks into the bush. Finally, he snorts himself awake as he touches the ground. Whoah. Okay. No idea who the kid in front of him is, but he can at least put together that he's... in a bush.

"... Well. This ain't the first time."

[demonthatcomes]

Huh. No strong reaction from Sans this time. No turning their Soul blue and lifting them in the air? Surely Sans would make sure he'd give them a bad time if he thinks they're doing anything suspicious. (Which they're not. In that case, Sans would be wary and cynical, but not confrontational)

"It's irresponsible sleeping in places like this. By the way, just to make sure... what's my name?"

[systematicsupport]

Even if there's no reason to be concerned about Sans accidentally drowning himself in his sleep, there are other reasons not to be sleeping in a fountain. It's getting to be warmer, but he could still get really cold underwater. Wouldn't it be more pleasant to sleep somewhere... dry?

That's what S-4 thinks at least, so he only peers down at Sans for a second before reaching into the water and lugging him out. He's just tall enough to be able to give even this older Sans a piggyback, so he gets him settled and then starts walking back to the castle. Hopefully there's a change of dry clothes...

He hasn't figured out that this isn't the Sans he knows.

[trombones]

At first, the piggyback doesn't disturb him enough to stir. As they start heading for the castle, though, the bigger skeleton starts waking up on his own.

"Papyrus...?"

Not likely. They were too low to the ground, and Papyrus was a lot taller. But he's been piggybacked around enough by his brother than the feeling is familiar, so it's the first thing he thinks as he blearily comes to.

[systematicsupport]

For a moment, the person carrying him freezes, before laughing softly. It's Papyrus' laugh, but a lot quieter, more hesitant.

"Are you still dreaming, Sans? It's me. I'm going to bring you to the bedroom. You shouldn't be napping out here!"

He's pretty sure the bedroom should be free. Sans-Serif doesn't nap nearly as much as his older counterpart.

[trombones]

Something's off - especially that laugh. But in his half-sleep, it doesn't completely register what or why. Instead, Sans just grunts.

"Whatever you say, bro..."

[systematicsupport]

It's certainly a little off. This Papyrus doesn't even say anything as he carries him the rest of the way to a bedroom... a bedroom that appears quite lived in, though Sans has never seen it before.

"I... think you have some spare clothes in the trunk, right?"

[lightofthestars]

Tauriel is returning to the kitchen with a basket of fruit when she hears the sound of something large falling into water. She halts with a frown, then changes course to the font.

As soon as she sees bubbles rising and a shape in the water, she drops the basket and runs.

Her first horrible thought is that Sans has given in to despair at last, yet soon she sees he is asleep. Somehow, he dreams through this.

Tauriel is not gentle as she snatches him from the font to hold him at arm's length. "Dôl asg! What do you think you are doing? You threw me into a dreadful fright!"

[trombones]

HOLY MOLEY. This woman already reminds of him someone, and he's not even conscious. He doesn't take nearly as long as Tauriel snatches and holds him. His eyes snap open and he jerks awake, staring at the woman holding him.

Uh.

"..."

Give him a second, because he has literally no idea what's going on.

"... Sorry?"

[lightofthestars]

"I should hope you are sorry." She barely stops herself from shaking him. "You could have died!"

What would she tell the children? It is true he would return in only three days, but those days would be long indeed.

[trombones]

"I hate to break it to you lady, but I don't have lungs."

Literally, he doesn't even need to breathe. It's just fun.

"Can you, uh, put me down now?"

[lightofthestars]

"A-Ai."

A blush colours her cheeks as she sets him down upon the rim of the font. Her voice is different indeed as she says, "Forgive me. In my fear, I had forgotten."

Yet: "Surely that cannot be comfortable, though. The waters are not warm."

[mxmorizethis]

He's wandering around again, and he just...stops, raising his eyebrows upon witnessing the snoozing skeleton. Well, that's new. Not that he hasn't seen skeleton people before, given Jack from Halloweentown, but this is...not exactly Jack.

And then he just casually yawns and tips over into the fountain, and Lea is not able to stifle a laugh. He walks over to check on the guy-- skeleton-- thing. And he's...still sleeping. He's snoring. In a fountain. Oh my god.

He laughs, putting his hand over his mouth to muffle the sound, and when he's done he kind of gingerly reaches down to prod the skeleton. "Oi," he says, grinning. "This isn't exactly the best spot for a nap, man. You're gonna be wet and icky when you wake up."