But summer has to come to an end sometime

[sansational]

Ever since S-4 talked Sans into sharing a room with him and Sans-Serif, sleep really has come a little easier. Not much - he still has bad dreams, they all do. But every little bit helps, especially when help is within arm's reach instead of on the other side of a door. Ever since hearing from Tauriel that the two babybones are also still suffering from bad dreams, Sans has been trying to find ways to help. But it's a problem that's stymied him for years to the point of giving up, so privately, he doesn't hold out too much hope.

It's been a relatively ordinary night - he read them both their story, tucked them in, and then curled up on the other side of S-4 from where Sans-Serif lay. Sleep came as quickly as it ever did. But whatever dreams Sans had, they were chased immediately from his head by the agony that awoke him, accompanied by the sharp crack of bone.

The pain jolts him upright, his hands scrabbling all over himself, searching for signs of damage. They finally come to rest on his own skull, and realize that it hasn't broken. It's just...shifted.

"no..."

More cracks like breaking twigs and shattered branches echo throughout the room. His fingers start to sharpen, he can feel his ribs expanding, each one accompanied by a gasp and a cry of pain from the skeleton. His marrow is on fire and burning him up from the inside out and no no no he has to get out of here...

Eventually, Sans makes it into the woods. But all that really does is ensure that he has enough room to finish transforming. By rights, it probably only takes a few hours, just like last time. But it's painful enough to feel as though it takes a lifetime. All he can do is lay on the ground and whimper and twitch, or else drag himself along in a futile attempt to escape the pain. All he can do is wait for it to finish happening.

Useless regrets and pointless despair chase themselves around his increasingly malformed skull. it's not fair, everything was supposed to be okay now, i was trying to be better, i promise i was...

Until even that level of thought is beyond him and he's reduced to begging senselessly. make it stop, please make it stop, i don't want to do this anymore, i made a mistake, please, Gaster...

At one point, he hears a voice in his head - a delusion, or a memory. it sounds like Frisk's voice, except not like their voice at all. Too late. Too late.


The forest has a new inhabitant, the next morning. The giant monster is something like a bear and something like a horse with a skull that more closely resembles that of a wolf. It's too big to go that deep into the trees, but it creeps around the edges of things. It keeps its distance from the castle, it treads carefully around any flowerbeds, but it's big enough to be easily noticed from a distance. Mostly, it can be found curled up in an apparent attempt to sleep, wherever the ground is clear enough for it to find room. Though whenever anyone approaches, one eyesocket opens to reveal a glowing blue orb of light within, and the creature lets out a wary growl. 

Otherwise, it can mostly be found trying to eat. The fruit trees in particular will find themselves frequently raided, with some of them picked entirely clean. Hopefully no one was in the mood for lemons this week. The creature barely has to stretch its neck to gobble fruit whole off the branches. 

This puts it somewhat at odds with the local birds, but even the most ornery peacock will beat a retreat whenever the beast parts its jaws just enough to let blue light bloom between its fangs. 

Comments

[lightofthestars]

First, she had heard Estu shouting, which had set her running. Next, she had heard Esfor scream, and the eagles of Aran Einior himself could not have bested her speed.

"Iynenin, what is the matter?" she calls to her sons as she passes through the door.

They are gripping each other fast; she flings herself to the ground and takes them both into her arms. Here they are safe, she tries to say without words. She will let no harm befall them.

[antitemporal]

They are gripping each other fast, and by the time Tauriel finds them, they are both sobbing openly, overwhelmed and terrified. Sans-Serif barely has time to register Tauriel's presence before she's pulled them both into her arms, and then even through the shock, he can't be scared.

"mother!" he wails in soul-wrenching relief, turning instead to cling to her as tightly as he clings to her brother. "look, s-4, tauriel's here, sh-she's here, she'll help, it'll be okay, it really will..."

He drags in several deep breaths, before lifting a face glowing bright with blue tears to stare pleadingly up at her. "it's the other me, he's t-turning into something, he's hurt and s-4 can't heal him and we have to find his lab but, but we don't know what to do, mom...!"

[systematicsupport]

As tightly as Sans-Serif may be holding him, S-4 still isn't functioning properly. Panic over abandoning Sans has been replaced with panic that Sans-Serif may be next, and he's still choking on his own sobs when Tauriel finds them.

Her embrace is overwhelming, but more so is what Sans-Serif calls her. Mother. He considers her a mother. She does care for them and love them as dearly as the bird in that book, but he doesn't know if that is right. He's just more confused, and more emotional at the thought. Slowly, he turns his tear-filled eyesockets to her.

"Mom...?"

If she's really their mother, she'll know what to do.

"Hush, my sons."

[lightofthestars]

Both her sons look up at her, eyes filled with tears. They seek answers from her, to a question which she does not know how to answer herself. Yet for the sake of their comfort, she will try.

"Sus, iynenin, I am here." She kisses one forehead, then the other. "Please do not be afraid. I have done for Sans what is in my power to do. Now we must wait."

[antitemporal]

She doesn't have magic like theirs' or a soul like theirs', but Sans-Serif still feels the reassurance she offers, deep in his soul. She clearly can't promise much, but that makes what she can promise worth even more. He smiles up at her, even as he tries to wipe his eyesockets clear.

"see? see, sans is still here. we still have time to find a way to help him." He leans over to nudge his skull against his brother's. "you can still find a way to help him." Because he knows that the idea of any alternative is what's really terrifying S-4 - the fact that he himself might have failed any version of his brother. For a wild moment, he wonders if the scientists put some sort of failsafe in his head, to trigger a reaction this strong as punishment. But...no. They wouldn't need to do that. All they had to do was make S-4 feel too much, to make up for the fact that Sans-Serif was never meant to feel at all.

He rests one hand on his fellow experiment's shoulder, the other on the side of his face. Sans-Serif is exhausted and scared as well, but he tries to offer even an echo of the same soothing magic that S-4 has for him in the past. "he wouldn't want you to be upset like this, brother, that's why he wanted us to run away, that's why he told us this could happen..."

[systematicsupport]

Her kind words, her gentle kiss, that's enough to soothe the soul, even without the magic a monster's soul is made of. S-4 starts at least to remember himself, to sense the world outside of his stuttering soul and his trembling bones. He can feel Sans-Serif in his arms properly now, and hear what he's trying to say.

Sans isn't okay yet. That's almost enough to make him panic again, but at least he's here. Tauriel is here too, and she's trying to help. If S-4 works with her, then he won't have failed him. He can't fail at all. There has to be a way to get him back. If he just... calms down...

But that's easier thought than even said, as his hands scramble along Sans-Serif's back, helplessly clinging to the fragments of magic his brother can offer. He needs to stop being upset, but the tears just keep flowing.

"Can't... I can't breathe..." he finally gasps out in between sobs.

[lightofthestars]

Estu is recovering, but Esfor is not. For now, she must look only to her youngest.

"Ionenin, look at me," she says, her voice gentle yet firm. "Breathe with me. Breathe in...."

She takes in a long slow breath, then lets it out just as slowly, watching for him to match it.

[antitemporal]

Tauriel looks to her youngest, and Sans-Serif looks with her. As soon as he realizes what Tauriel is trying to do, he gathers up one of S-4's hands in both of his once more. "just follow mom," he urges his brother quietly. "it's gonna be okay, s-4."

Then he tries to breathe with Tauriel as well, to show S-4 how it's done. In, and then out. As he exhales, he squeezes S-4's hand a little more tightly, like squeezing water out of a towel or air out of a balloon. When he breathes in again, he loosens his grip. And all the while, he offers what little healing magic he can muster - whatever he can give is the least of what S-4 deserves, and anything that might soothe him is worth trying.

[systematicsupport]

It takes a few repetitions of that slow breath for S-4 to finally understand and listen to what they're doing. It takes a few more breaths, paired with Sans-Serif squeezing his hands to the rhythm, for him to slow his breathing down, his breathing hoarse and shaky, but slow. His tears slow as well, until there's only the faint traces of magic around his eyesockets, and his sobs are reduced to the occasional hiccup.

His soul still feels jittery and unsure, but he's at least stopped the adrenaline rush enough to think. Enough to hope. There's going to be a way to fix this, he's sure of it... if he just stays calm.

He pulls a hand away from his brother's to scrub at his face.

"I'm sorry... I just couldn't stop."

[lightofthestars]

At once, she embraces Esfor as best she can without letting go of Estu.

"Hênig, do not ask for forgiveness for your fright. What is happening is fearful. Your fear is natural."

She pulls back enough to gently brush a tear from his eye-socket. "I, too, am scared by what has happened this night. Yet if we all support each other as a family, we will endure."

[antitemporal]

"right!" Sans-Serif nods his immediate agreement, smiling in reassurance up at his brother. And now that Tauriel is here with them, it's an offer of reassurance that doesn't even look strained - he means it wholeheartedly. "it's not just us anymore, s-4. it's tauriel, too." Back when they had first discovered the idea of mothers, Sans-Serif had had his doubts about S-4's initial assumption that mothers and brothers were anything alike. Cats and hats weren't, after all. But now that he has one of his own, he can see that they're very similar, that a family can be more than just one person.

He looks to Tauriel, then, because Sans is bad at explaining things to anyone who's not another him. "we need to find his lab. this has happened before. i think he knew it could happen now. so if we find his lab, m..." He almost says "maybe", but stops himself. "...we can find a way to fix him!"

[systematicsupport]

He's suffering so many emotions at once. First all that panic and fear, and now misery over his brother, paired with hope that they can fix this and a huge burst of affection that yes, Tauriel said she would be their mother... paired with nerve-wracking doubt that maybe that will change. He always can't help but worry. It's so easy to assume he'll do something to mess this up.

But... he has to have hope. For both of his brother's sakes. For his family.

He nods in agreement with Sans-Serif's plan. "We can find it. I... I've found it a lot of times before, so if we go there, all of his work should still be there, and then..."

And then he'll be alright? Yes, he will. S-4 can't doubt that.

[antitemporal]

"besides," Sans-Serif adds, glancing up at Tauriel with a proud smile. "he can't hide it from me." The tricks the castle would perform for Sans, it would also perform for Sans-Serif. He only hadn't bothered to look before, back when Sans was doing these dangerous things in the first place, because Sans-Serif generally wanted to spend as little time as possible with people who upset his brother.

The smaller skeleton gets up carefully to his feet, and offers S-4 a hand up as well. As soon as his brother takes it, Sans-Serif reaches up with his other hand. He rests it on the side of S-4's skull, gently guiding his fellow experiment's head down until he can nudge their foreheads together. "it's gonna be okay, s-4," he says again. With Tauriel here, with S-4 back on his feet, he can even believe it.

The search might go faster with Tauriel carrying them, but between the two of them, S-4 and Sans-Serif should be able to piece together the directions to the lab relatively quickly. Rather than being up in a tower as it had been before, it's simply been relocated to a higher floor. The only thing missing is the telescope, but all the flasks and vials and contraptions are still piled around. And the writing has been reconstructed on the walls, some in a language comprehensible to Tauriel, some of it in symbols.

[lightofthestars]

Tauriel cannot say she is comfortable with this. To bring her children into the room wherein the instruments of Sans' torment are held...she shivers with the wrongness.

Yet she does not think they would obey should she forbid them from entering. The best she can do, then, is to stay with them at all times, watching so that they do not come to harm.

In the corner she remains, waiting with her arms wrapped around her body.