Ready Player One

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[First thing Michael notices is that his ass isn't planted in the beanbag chair he fell asleep in. What is being a senior for other than late night video game benders with your best friend in the world, right? Yeah.

Man is he stiff, though. He groans and shifts around, trying to get comfortable again. It fails miserably.

A moment later he opens his eyes with a big frown and sits up.

Definitely not his bean bag. Not his room??? He didn't even drink last night what gives...]

Yo, Jeremy, this isn't funny.

[He stumbles to his feet and stretches to get life back into his limbs. He's in some like old-fashioned sitting room? In a really uncomfortable chair. There's like a fireplace and shit.]

Who's house even is this?! How did you get me here? Jeremyyyyyyy!

Comments

[jakeyd]

[He rubs the back of his head a bit awkwardly.]

Ha, yeah, I get that. I was thinking something similar when I got dropped here.

[Unfortunately Jake can't actually assure Micheal anything is about to make sense, even with an explanation; so instead he just waves for 'Big M' to follow him to the nearest window and leads the way. Once there he'll just sorta stand by and wait for Micheal to absorb the new, bizarre scenery.]

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[At least Jake is acting more or less normal. Like Jake. That's comforting, sort of. At least it makes sense.

Unlike the view Michael is getting from this window. He squints. Rubs his eyes, taps the glass, opens the window and sticks his arm out. He frowns.]

Impressive trick.

[Please tell him its a trick.]

[jakeyd]

Uh, do you mean the floating island or are you still in denial? Because, I hate to tell you this bro, but... [Jake gently puts a hand on Micheal's shoulder to keep him feeling as grounded as possible.]

I can actually lead you down there. To the edge, I mean--it's pretty freaky. Like, it would be a lot cooler if someone hadn't kidnapped us and we had come by choice, but it loses a lot of charm when we're just stuck up here. Oh, uh, we're stuck up here, by the way.

[He rubs his face with the hand not on Micheal's shoulder. That was a terrible way to introduce Micheal to the place! He's definitely going to be freaked out now.] Ah, shit, that was a lame explanation; sorry dude I haven't had to do this before.

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[Please excuse Michael while he opens his mouth to speak and then just. Stays like that for a minute. Eventually his voice finds him.]

Like I don't mean to be rude, bro, but this really feels like a bad trip right now. Like, none of that makes any sense! Who brought us here? And how? You... don't know. Or you would have told me.

[Rubs his temples.]

Is it... safe?

[jakeyd]

No, I get it dude, I thought the hospital had given me something weird when I got here.

[Jake hesitates when the question of safety comes up.]

...Kiiinda? Not really. Mostly? Sort of? Like, nothing too horrible has happened but Rich almost choked on a ring inside a cupcake and I ran into some kind of possessed anime cat girl with a haunted doll. Plus the castle...sorta has a squip? I told it to fuck off pretty fast so I don't know what it's doing here.

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Not that I think you'd lie to me, dude, but I'm still pretty sure I'm high right now. Maybe it'll sink in eventually.

[OH GREAT THAT ALL SOUNDS REALLY AWESOME AND FUN AND GOOD.]

Fffffffantastic. We should probably stick together, then. We shouldn't leave Rich alone. Where is he?

[He lifts his hands, palms pressed together, to his chin. He takes in a breath and points them out.]

How the fuck does a building have a squip.

[jakeyd]

[Jake holds his hands out as he shrugs.] I have no idea dude! I ran it off so it couldn't figure anything out it could use against me. It's weird as hell! It shits emojis!

Oh, uh, but Rich is either back at the cake room or in his room.

[twoplayergay]

It... shits.... emoji.... [He just puts his hands up in defeat] Of course it does.

[Clearly some research and recon needs to be done around here. But first he should make sure his friends don't get themselves killed.]

Well, uh, lets go make sure he doesn't choke on anything again. Or get creeped on by the SQUIP, or something.

[jakeyd]

Oh shit dude, I didn't even think of the squip creeping on him, yeah. Let's try the rooms first so you know where they are.

[After all, Rich knows about the gem spiked cake so he's less likely to choke now. Jake waves for Micheal to follow before leading the way.]

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[What are friends for other than protecting each other from malicious omniscient technology?]

Oh, sure, yeah, that's good. So there are just like... rooms? Empty rooms like in a hotel? But nobody claiming to have brought us here?

[jakeyd]

Yeah, nobody we've met seems to know how we got here? It's the same story for all of us and everybody's blaming the castle itself. [He shrugs.]
I mean, it's kinda magic and floating and it healed me and Rich so I could see that I guess? But I dunno, it's pretty weird dude. Rich still says we were kidnapped.

[Hey, wait. Why hasn't Micheal brought up his legs working? The castle too much of a shock or something?]

[twoplayergay]

Kidnapped by a sentient flying castle. Sure. Why the fuck not.

[He throws his hands up into the air.]

Wait, whaddaya mean 'healed you'? Did you get your stupid selves hurt again?

[Concerned mother hen mode: activate.]

[jakeyd]

Again?? [Jake stops and looks back at Micheal, confused.]

Dude, we were brought here straight out of the hospital. Like, you just saved everybody. The place took my wheel chair out from under me and dropped me on my ass.

Waaas...that not the same for you? [It feels like magic shenanigans are afoot.]

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[A very uncomfortable lightbulb moment goes off for Michael. Jake and Rich came right from the hospital... but he doesn't think they're missing.

For the second time in his life, Michael is very, very glad he is exactly the kind of nerd that he is. He can make almost immediate sense of that thanks to his love of the fantasy genre. He takes a breath and lifts a hand to gesture with.]

No, it wasn't. It was the end of the year for me. Summer has just started. We must have gotten taken from... different points on the timeline? Possibly you and Rich came together because you had close proximity. That's good to know...

I love this icon because it can be angery or thinkin real hard

[jakeyd]

[Jake tilts his head a bit as he thinks this over, arms crossed.]

So you're like...future Micheal, then? I guess this is definitely some sort of weird other dimension, then. Like, I thought maybe it could just be a magic castle floating over earth and no one had noticed because magic, but. Not if time travel is involved.

[Guess that means trying to make parachutes is out.]

Oh! Have I apologized to you yet? Like, in the future?

god i love his face

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[Michael nods along. Yes, he is Future Michael then, probably. Weird. He could get into that, though. The future is pretty tight, all things considered.]

No, dude, I'm pretty sure this is another dimension or a pocket reality or some shit.

[Please don't try to parachute. Please.]

Yeah, you have. [His face softens and he fidgets a little.] Really, bro, it's okay. You don't need to apologize as much as you do. We're cool now, promise.

smooshes all their faces

[jakeyd]

Pocket reality? So it's small?

[I dunno man maybe they could at least find out what's down there, if anything. It might not be so 'pocket' if they do! Getting back up here could be a problem, though.]

I mean--if you're sure? [Jake goes a bit pink, and he rubs the back of his neck; looking away for a minute.]

I just wish I'd been treating everyone right from the start, you know?

smooshes their faces TOGETHER

[twoplayergay]

Smaller than a whole Universe maybe. Depends on if there's anything.... you know. Past the edge.

[Michael is usually all for adventure dude but that sounds suicidal. No thanks.]

Yeah, I'm sure.

[He smiles encouragingly, waits until Jake is looking at him again and slings an arm around his shoulders.]

If we never made mistakes we'd never learn anything new, dude. It's fine. You're a good guy just trying to survive high school. Like all of us.

g o o d

[jakeyd]

Just clouds, as far as I can tell. I wish we had one of those drone things to find out for sure, but I haven't found any real tech here so far.

[That's probably gonna come as terrible news to Micheal. But at least he got a sheepish smile out of Jake, so maybe that can help soften the blow a bit?]

Aha, yeah, I guess it's pretty dumb to be so hard on myself when everyone's basically living mistake machines from the day we're born.

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Now that would be ni- oh no you're kidding me, right?

[No technology.... in the whole castle.... he was hoping all this medieval shit was just aesthetic! He is going to d i e. His face actually gets a little pale. Well, as pale as he ever can be.]

Th-there's gotta be some tech around here somewhere....

[Priorities, Mell. He gives Jake a friendly jostle.]

Yeah, that's right! I mean shit, look at all the rest of us. The squip debacle just turned it all up to eleven, but yeah. It's chill, dude. High school is the prime time for mistakes. At least you're trying to be a good person. I know you haven't done it yet, but you've been a great influence on me, dude. Seriously.

now I get to use this as a determined face too.

[jakeyd]

I mean, maybe there is some tech hiding around here? It's a pretty big place and we've only been here a few days. You okay bro?

[He seems pretty surprised by the 'great influence' bit.]

Oh, really dude? How--wait, no, don't tell me! I'll figure it out myself. That sort of stuff is supposed to happen naturally.

[Jake crosses his arms and nods with a determined look on his face. He's not even thinking about messing up timelines, he just thinks it'll count more if he does it without knowing anything.]

I'll get there eventually!

perfect

[twoplayergay]

No, dude, not really.

[He has lived most of his life with some form of tech in his hands okay he doesn't know what to do with himself without video games or weed. And he currently has neither. This is a crisis situation.

At least Jake is a delight. Michael huffs a laugh and crosses his arms right back with a smile.]

All right. You lemme know when you think you've got it, alright?

[jakeyd]

I will! [But as far as Jake's concerned that part of the conversation is now over because Micheal isn't alright. His determination melts into concern.]

Do you need like, fresh air or something? Should I get you to the garden instead? Or a bed? Water? [What else helps people suddenly not feeling well?]

Should I carry you?

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[Oh no this is not what he wanted. Michael is suddenly deeply embarrassed and tries to hold his hands up and shake his head to dismiss Jake's worries.]

Oh, shit, no, man! It's nothing like that! I'm just being all dramatic about suddenly being in the stone age. I didn't mean to make you all seriously worried about me!

[He touches Jake's arm comfortingly.]

You're a peach, dude, but I'm fine. [A beat] Do you... actually think you could carry me, though, dude? I'm not a small guy.

[Positive... subject.... change?]

[jakeyd]

Oh! Ohhh...I thought you were having problems with the altitude or something, since. Floating castle, and all. [He scratches the back of his head and shrugs.]

The lack of tech definitely sucks, but the magic stuff is pretty cool. [Oh! Arm touch. Okay, Jake is sufficiently comforted...and as soon as the subject changes to being able to carry people, he brightens immediately.]

Oh, for sure dude! [Rather than simply brag, Jake immediately scoops Micheal into a princess carry as easily as if he were picking up a pet or small child.]

See? I've carried people to the nurses office tons of times! Plus Rich for like, fun, and bro is like ninety percent muscle mass.