That makes two of them who don't know what they want, then. Toshi's feelings would be confused enough with only one of the factors currently at stake here, and there are plenty of them. He wants Barnaby (and Kotetsu) to be happy. He wants them to have each other, and he wants to be involved in their lives. He wants to be able to care for them... and he wants them to be with him, too.
But that's so horribly selfish, especially now, no matter how hard it is not to think about it. He mentally chides himself. Calm yourself, Toshi, he wants to be your friend, that's way more than you can ask of him right now.
"It's really sweet of you to worry about me." he'd rather you just worry about yourself, but he can't deny the little spark of love he feels to know Barnaby was worrying about him.
The flinch almost makes him pull away. He hesitates, pulling back just a little. But Barnaby says it's okay. Is he trying to lie for Toshi's sake, because he thinks he should? He should trust him, though. Trust his words over his reactions. He did before, and he will now. Toshi takes a slow breath and rests his hand on Barnaby's shoulder, looking somewhat expectantly.
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But that's so horribly selfish, especially now, no matter how hard it is not to think about it. He mentally chides himself. Calm yourself, Toshi, he wants to be your friend, that's way more than you can ask of him right now.
"It's really sweet of you to worry about me." he'd rather you just worry about yourself, but he can't deny the little spark of love he feels to know Barnaby was worrying about him.
The flinch almost makes him pull away. He hesitates, pulling back just a little. But Barnaby says it's okay. Is he trying to lie for Toshi's sake, because he thinks he should? He should trust him, though. Trust his words over his reactions. He did before, and he will now. Toshi takes a slow breath and rests his hand on Barnaby's shoulder, looking somewhat expectantly.